No more Flea-bies

BLM:90 WHM:90 SMN:90 THF:90 WAR:90 DRK:90 RNG:90 PLD:90

Forgetfully, I sometimes wade into the kitchen oblivious that the cat may have left a puddle full of fleas there. So, in preparation, I like to roll up my pants sleeves up to my knees. That way, if I sense even the slightest itch, I reach down and grab the nefarious blood-sucker and dump him into the toilet bowl.

You see, at first when I had problems with fleas, I went to the bathroom and pierced the flea in half. This took some effort. I could either feel the flea or not feel it because of how FAT it was with my blood. If it was fat, then I would easily grip and pierce it. If not, then it might escape as I struggled to grip it onto my fingernails.

Gruesome stuff, huh?

So as I got better and better at picking the buggers sooner and sooner, it got harder and harder to pierce them. And if I got frustrated at all or unfocused, BING, it would escape me. And this would really annoy me because as soon as I started to feel the itch from its bite a couple of minutes later, I knew that it was a freebie.

The genie of the LAMP does not like to give out freebies or flea-bies.

So the next step was to take them over to the sink and do my business there so that if they escaped, I could maybe catch them again. And then after a while I started to fill the sink with water and just try drowning them. This was especially useful once an infestation of them cropped up and this seemed to work I thought but just in case I roly-polied them a little first and then dunked them to the deep part to see if they would sink to the bottom. It's a funny experiment with fleas because you can really tell a lot by watching them.

Now they are already guilty of drawing blood so it's like the guy said in SIN CITY.

"I love hit-men, no matter what you do to them, you don't feel bad."

Fleas are a lot like people in this respect. Because when I put them in there by themselves and they don't know any better, they struggle and struggle and sometimes amaze me. But if I start a colllection, like I did once because there was an infestation of em and my legs were RIDDLED with bites, then they seem to give up quicker.

I once had the sink FILLED with dead fleas. I'd have to say at least 20 fleas. But just drop em in that water filled with their buddies and down to the bottom they would go as though accepting their grave.

Now after the infestation was over, I changed it up some. Because fleas only crop up every now and again maybe because of the eggs hatching or whatever that seems to happen for no reason, I start to get fleas and its time to roll up my pants again, because I can't stand to have fleas in my room.

To thwart that, instead of coming into the bedroom with my pants down and who knows what waiting to jump up to my stomach or arms or whatever and maybe bite me when I least expect it, I go directly from the kitchen to the bathroom BEFORE coming to the bedroom, to clean myself of possible fleas.

Now lately I have begun to find fleas again. Anytime the cat's medicine wears off or we put put new drops on him or put a flea collar on him, the fleas come off of him and onto me.

I have some SWEET blood, in case you didn't know. My blood is preferential to any other's in most cases because I am always the first one to get the fleas.

Ya'll should be thankful for that.

What I did as an improvement in recent months is to instead of try to drown the fleas and spend like 5 minutes trying to roly-poly or pierce them, I have simply dropped them into the toilet bowl. I felt sure that by flushing them, they would at least be gone. I have found in recent months that this is not the case. I once noticed fleas were coming out the drain in the sink so I wondered if they could hold their breath or something.

The answer is yes.

They can and not only that I have seen them come swimming to the top after sinking all the way to the bottom. I have even tried dropping a piece of toilet paper on them to suffocate them. After a while, I started to ball the paper up, let the flea cling on to it and then sink the whole thing to the bottom. And you would not believe it, when they think I'm not lookin, the fleas can actually crawl up the piece of paper, out into the water, swim up top, and float there all alive and waiting to be flushed out into wherever they know they will make it.

Well, that drew my consternation just a little bit. I watched the little thing floating there, the INSECT or arthropod that it is, and wondered and wondered at it.

So I wiped my butt with the toilet paper and sank THAT to the bottom with it.

Success.

PS. Ya'll know what racism is right?  Yeah, how I just treated these fleas... is racism.