Alone again

BLM:75 WHM:66 SMN:43 THF:75 WAR:61 RNG:43
x

I have to find new people to hang out with. A lot of the times I find myself wishing I had closer friends. Last night I tried explaining things to my sister and she is like " you've changed ". She used to be my closest friend and now she is like all on THEIR side.

x

Sometimes I wonder who I can even trust to speak to cuz I'm sure I know what I am doing and that every negative thing I am thinking is not without basis. Still, I guess many people would just rather I didn't mention stuff like tht to them cuz if it's baggage to me, how much more baggage is that to some third party. Heh, probably a lot. It probably comes across as weak anyways so no wonder it sucks to hear about it.

x

I haven't played the game in a while and even though I like to play it, I find myself getting treated with disdain even online at times. I am sure it's nothing I have said cuz I don't insult people but I do tend to base my opinions on my own experience which tends to give people the idea that I think I know more than them.

x

Trust me when I tell you that I believe everyone's opinion is at least as valuable as my own.

x

Well that's all I guess, I would like to tell you who I miss but honestly my love wheels I think are grinding down to a slow jam halt. Oh that reminds me, a friend of mine's old girlfriend showed up last night and I was honestly tempted by her eyes. Someone sat next to her and jammed her on the shoulder and then she met some of the people at the table and then she played for a little while and then she quickly left midgame. I am SO out of her league I guess. I sure wish I knew what it was that made her leave but that will have to wait for another day.

x

I got really angry at the guy that bumped her though and now I feel ashamed for having let him see that since perhaps it was completely misplaced.

I am so confused. I just wanna sleep until it all gets better but I know I can't.

x

My internet connection was down all day Friday. If you ever think about what a deal Voice over the Internet is and start humming that song from Vonage, fight the temptation. Every little blip in the power connection sends the phone filter out of whack and when that happens both my phone and my internet go to limbo until the filter cools down or something. It's very frustrating. Sometimes I think about buying another filter just in case but I am not even sure that is the problem.